Hello My Freaky Darlings~
Here’s a little ‘tease’ from my forthcoming book – my very first book ever to be published! – “Poetry & Other Musings: Dreams of Love Lost & Won”.
Alone I sit, here, in my castle, proud.
I am bereft, once again left to my own devices.
My painful pleas unheard by the Gods;
My cries fall now upon deaf ears.
Loneliness surrounding me:
I am but a silent shell.
I long for deep, endless oblivion,
To turn my eyes away from the memory
Of the light that was once so bright and warm.
Oh no, do not mistake my mourning for that
Of a woman that longs to end her life.
My life shall continue;
I shall not give them the satisfaction of cold flesh.
What dwells here now, however,
Will only be emptiness, despair, loneliness.
My heart is broken, shattered like a mirror;
My soul has departed with his warmth,
My spirit lies buried under layers of agony.
All that remains is my mind;
It alone has survived this tragedy,
This travesty of fate.
It alone drives this shell I once called home,
This shell he once also called home.
Love, hope, joy were once
The sustenance that bade me live;
Happiness, my drink, once flowed,
As endless as a fountain.
Now, only darkness,
Now, only pain,
Now, only endless torment
At the hands of these gentle, beautiful memories.
Again I cry, “Will you not hear me?”
“Can you not see my tears?”
“Will you not help me?”
“Do you no longer care?”
There is no answer.
I sit and wonder,
What crime have I committed,
That now I pay for?
What riddle from what past life,
That now I must resolve before I may be whole?
I look to the heavens,
Eyes filled with endless tears,
Wishing only for His touch, His face,
Hearing only His words,
Wishing only for His touch, His lips upon mine.
I stand and wipe my eyes,
Reddened from my pain.
With head held low,
I make my way back to my castle.
I walk down dark, empty halls.
No sounds here but that of my hollow footsteps,
And the sound of my blood,
Pounding in my veins.
Cold chills my face, my hands,
Tries to sting the soul that no longer lives here.
I make my way to my throne;
I sit there in silent condemnation of my misspent life.
There is no one, save me, to sit in judgment of the wasted years;
No one, save me, to hear my cries.
No one here to dry my tears.
My body, moving slowly,
Back and forth, back and forth;
My arms around me in futile effort
To comfort a spirit long dead.
I am formed of tears and sadness:
None can console me in this hurt.
So I shall sit here,
Keeping company with my sweet memories,
Praying for a swift and merciful future…